Broken Bitches Guide with Mandy Brooke
Broken Bitches Guide is the self-help podcast made for the hot mess with a healing heart. Hosted by the hilarious social media icon Mandy Brooke, this podcast playfully helps women laugh through the breakdowns, cry through the glow-ups, and transmute their brokenness into power. Whether you're manifesting miracles or spiraling in your car, you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be. Welcome to the REAL guidebook for losing your sh*t and becoming your best self.
Broken Bitches Guide with Mandy Brooke
3 Tips for a More Confident You!
Being confident isn't as hard as you may think. In my first podcast episode, I reveal my top three tips to become a more confident you!
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"How to Look High Status in Any Situation"
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Wait, what? Hey, this is the ha ha. Wait, what? Podcast with Mandy Brooke. I'm an entertainer, content creator and musician. You may know me from my song parodies and funny antics on Instagram and TikTok. On my podcast, we try to make sense of the confusing parts of life because literally we're all winging it and have no idea what we're doing. And that's totally OK. So relax, grab a glass of wine and let's chat. Holy crap, Ola Batman. I cannot believe I'm recording my very first podcast episode ever. I'm honestly so terrified. But I think that's usually how something feels when you're doing something right. So I think we're in a good spot. I'm very grateful for you. Thank you so much for being here. I was struggling to figure out how to operate this podcast, to be honest. But I think for these first few episodes, I'm going to answer the questions that I get the most often on social media. And one of the questions I get pretty much every day from women all over the world is how do I not give any fucks. Like, how do I stay confident and vulnerable at the same time? And how do I not care what people think? And honestly, I feel a sense of imposter syndrome whenever someone asks me that, because I spent most of my 20s as a people pleaser. I was always congealing myself to other people and what they wanted, and I made everyone feel so warm and comfortable. And at the expense of myself. But thankfully, I'm recovering. I am coming into this new version of myself where I am saying no way, way more often than I say yes. Somebody legitimately has to convince me to do something in order for me to do it, which actually brings me to my very first tip for being more confident is letting your default mode be no. You heard that right. Say no first, in your mind at least. Because when you say no, and that's your default mode, then you're asking that other person, convince me. Because I value myself. I value my time. I value my energy budget, as Tony Jones says. And when you do that, you're basically tricking your mind into assessing the value that you will receive from that situation, no matter what. And that is the key. And that may feel so uncomfortable for you at first because we are born and bred as women to people please, to say yes, to make people feel warm and comfortable, but fuck that. It is time to put ourselves first. So I challenge you, the next time someone asks you to do something, even if you want to do it, say no in your mind first and allow them to convince you. Oh, and side note, If your sweet old grandmother asks you for a ride, obviously don't cost analysis that situation. Use your discretion, of course, but especially when it comes to your career, your friends, and just overall life in general, definitely use the no default mode. It will help you so much. I'll be back in a sec. First, let's hear from our sponsors that make this podcast possible. Herbal Face Food is the most potent anti-aging skincare product on the market. Period. And I should know because I've been using it for months and I've literally been obsessed. Herbal face food isn't a magic potion. It's simply the best of plant science at work. No fillers, no chemicals, no BS. The powerful potent serum is packed with antioxidants that heal your skin at a cellular level from the outside in and addresses the top signs of aging in three days or less. I personally noticed a huge difference in my skin texture and the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles when I combined both the serum Welcome back! The second tip that I have for being a more confident you is to gratitude. Yes, I know it sounds cheesy, lucky girl syndrome, whatever. But being thankful for the place that you're in is a major part of not only manifesting confidence, but Being confident. For example, one of the things that I don't take for granted ever is my 2007 gray Toyota Corolla. Some may even be embarrassed by it. The plastic cover thing is coming off the driver's side and it's not the prettiest car in the world. But bitch, that thing has brought me everywhere. She cannot be stopped. I don't have a car payment on it and she's brought me so much convenience to my life. So I fucking stand for Fran. That's what I call her. Thank you so much for joining us. And you may be wondering, Mandy, why would I be thankful for the body that I have because it's not where I want it to be or the house that I live in because it's not really my ideal living situation? Well, betch, get out of your own head. Your body is helping you move through life and it's breathing and it may have bared a child or two. Holy freaking crap. You ramboed a human child out of your vagina? Dude, be thankful for that. And your house, yeah, may not be your ideal living situation, but it's keeping you out of the elements. It's keeping you from the rain and snow and sleet and hail. Thank God for that. So yeah, root yourself into a state of gratitude and your confidence will soar. And last but not least, tip number three is reversing the question, am I, to I am. It's like another psychology mind trick of reversing the, am I good enough for this position at work? Am I being a good enough mother to my children? To, I am perfectly qualified for this position at work because I've been doing everyone's job for the last five years in this office and Mark from accounting is a chode. I am a good mother because I literally have a Stargate Atlantis portal between my legs and my children are watered, fed, and happy. Yes, I am, I am, I am. And if you're feeling imposter syndrome for saying I am, I am, then the fake it till you make it method literally works. I should know it's been my ultimate motto my entire life. If I don't feel like I know how to do something, I just pretend like I know until I figure it the fuck out. I learn by experience and I think that's where a lot of my confidence comes from is just by doing. And playing pretend is fun as shit. Dating and advice YouTuber Shallon Lester often says to embody someone strong like Rihanna or Kourtney Kardashian and my personal idol has always been Beyonce like we have the same birthday for god fucking sakes so when I'm feeling like a dumpy little troll I embody Beyonce I walk into a room with crazy in love playing in my head and no matter how I'm feeling beforehand my mood instantly lifts and I become the baddest bitch da da da da da da da I think the thing that has become the most striking realization as I've become a fully fledged adult was that no one really knows what they're doing. And normally the person that's perceived as the most confident in the room also doesn't really know what they're doing either. They just hold themselves really well. Of course, there's confidence in the knowledge you possess, but there's also confidence in body language. And there's a video on YouTube that explains this perfectly. It's called How to Look High Status in Any Situation by Charisma on Command. And the synopsis is this. There's an external kind of confidence that helps you land negotiations or make friends and seduce easily. And then there's an internal confidence, which is dictated by how comfortable you feel in any situation. Body language is a huge, huge factor in this. Whenever I go into a room, I always make sure that I'm comfortable. My stance is feminine because I identify as a feminine woman, but I'm not afraid to sit down and relax and lean back. My comfort is my number one priority in meetings or in intense situations, and I will take my time to ensure I'm calm and collected. I've also found it's very helpful to move slowly. Not like a weird sloth. Please don't fucking do that. But if I'm feeling particularly jittery or excited or anxious, I just take a really deep breath and I'll consciously make my movements slower. And think of it from the other person's perspective too. And I've learned this from performing on stage for years and years. Would you feel comfortable if someone you were trying to speak to had closed arms and was shaking their leg incessantly and was visibly nervous? No.
UNKNOWN:No.
SPEAKER_00:You'd be much more open and comfortable with someone who flowed into the room and took up space and sat and relaxed in a chair and smiled and took a breath. I remember going to my first stand-up comedy show. I was not performing and I've never done stand-up comedy but I was watching amateurs go up and the ones that were really jittery on stage made me physically nervous because I was constantly wondering oh my god are they gonna fuck up? Are they gonna fuck up? And that's gonna feel so uncomfortable for me. Oh my gosh. But the people that came up on stage and were just really cool and collected and moved slowly I was just so This is quickly turning into 15 tips, but whatever, it's my podcast. My last tip is to be quiet. Unless you're performing on stage or, you know, doing something like that, confidence is not loud or boastful. Confidence is non-reactive and quiet. I find, especially in business, that if I sit and I listen in a non-reactive way, I learn a lot. Because people want to fill the silence when somebody is silent, you know? So... I make unwavering eye contact with them and I hold my ground and then I'll begin to see that I'm getting the upper hand because they're over explaining everything. It doesn't happen in every situation but silence does make people uneasy and use that to your advantage because they'll want to fill the void. That makes it much easier to land negotiations because the other person has just spilled their beans and you made them nervous. Good for you. That's a little manipulation tactic so don't overuse that of course but confident people don't have to over explain themselves. They just live and they breathe it, even if they don't know what they're doing either. So those are my three tips to becoming a more confident you. Making know your default mode, gratitude, and using I am statements or the fake it till you make it method. If you loved this episode, go ahead and subscribe, rate, and review this podcast so it becomes more visible to more and more besties like you. Till next time, be a fucking delight, bitch.
UNKNOWN:Bye.